A Split Second

The crowd rush in as my name was whispered through the thin air of winter. Time seem to pause in the split second as the last part of my name was pronounced.I turn around but the crowd of faces block every direction of the streets. Feet off the bike petal, I search for the face voicing my name.

A white blur caught my eyes but it disappeared as the snow came down hindering any thought that might have crossed my mind. A burst of uncontrollable eruptions enter my chest and travel to my eyes and outside of me. My view soaked by the very emotions that I tried to avoid, I wipe away the spills of silent tears.The snow falling heavier now, covering the gray pavement wrapping the city in white feathers. I look up at the sky, feeling the cool touch of frozen rain on my cheeks.

A sudden warm wind swept the atmosphere. I hear the calls of sirens passing by - a faded sound of desperation. Placing my feet against the petals, I continued on with the snow following me.

This came out after seeing the Japanese movie, Love Letter.

August Give-Away

UPDATE: We've got a winner!

Well, here it is, after 70 entries, with some odd comments and pleadings, I have finally got the winner. This was my first time hosting a contest and also in trying to pick a random winner. Here's how the winner was pick:

1. A number was assigned to each comment by the order they were received. I had to move some numbers up because of duplicate entries. Numbers were place on scraps of papers.


2. The papers were put into a piggy bank.


3. The piggy bank was shake with the bottom of the piggy bank open. (The paper won't come out of the small opening at the top.)


4. Shake until pieces of papers falls out - those were then eliminated - until at last - only one piece of paper was left.



The winner is number 24 -- which is Jennifer. Congratulations Jennifer! You will be receiving an email from me. Thanks to everyone who entered.

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UPDATE: Contest Closed

No more entries. Winner will be announce sometimes this week or next. Thanks everyone for playing. This contest was to win one (1) DVD (as in one movie) of your choice from either amazon.com or yesasia.com. I guess that wasn't quite clear.

Thanks Laane at Laane on the world for hosting a August giveaway. I hear she might even do another one in September so check out her site.

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"I don't take the movies seriously, and anyone who does is in for a headache. " Bette Davis

Fellow She Who Blogs member, Laane at Laane on the world is hosting a August giveaway. Read about it here. So I thought I join in. My love of foreign films led me to do this contest. This contest is to win one (1) DVD of your choice from either amazon.com or yesasia.com. Contest ends on August 31, 2007. Winner will be chosen randomly and will be announce here on or after September 1st.

The rules of this contest are simple:
(1) Leave a comment and make sure I have a way to reach you - either through a blog link or an email.
(2) You must be a resident of the United States.

That's it. No need to link to me or write a post or run a marathon. It would be appreciated that you would not submit anonymous comments - they will be deleted. I won't said how much I'm willing to spent as long as you pick a decent movie. Good luck!

I do recommend any foreign film that explores the ordinary life. Of cause I'm biased but you may pick American movies as well. It's your choice. Here's a list 10 of my favorite films that I recommend (some might not be available on DVD):

01. Love Letter (Japanese/2002)

02. Over The Rainbow (Korean/2002)

03. Roman holiday (1953)

04. Harvey (1950)

05. Sound of colors (Chinese/2003)

06. Now voyager (1942)

07. Il Mare (aka Siworae - Love across time) (Korean/2000)

08. The legend of 1900 (1999)

09. Christmas in August (Korean/1998)

10. Tokyo Story (Japanese/2003) or any Yasujiro Ozu films

Memories of you

This is based on the Korean movie, Christmas in August. I really like this movie and I thought it would be a nice exercise in writing from the girl's point of view. The movie only show a few glimpses into her life. So I thought why not write from her perspective and explore her side of the story? The result is this. I wrote it like a long letter. In some ways her thoughts are mix together and sometimes what she remembered may not be what she wrote. Memories are strange, sometimes you remember the simple things not in order but in fragments, pieces that may or may not fit to a certain memory. Almost like scatter thoughts.

It was a hot August day. It was my first week at a new job as a meter maid. Fending off angry drivers for eight hours a day, five days a week was no picnic. I can see their anger like a fog as my partner and I approached in our car. Most of them managed to get to their cars and drove away. But we caught a couple of people who park in a no-park zone. We wrote them tickets and took photos as evidence. I carried a portable camera with me just for this purpose. Sometimes those angry shouts in my ears can produce a certain anger inside of me to show up. I try not to show my discomfort whenever possible.

I was in a rush to get the films develop. My partner mention to me about a small photo shop just around the corner. I didn't put much thought to it so I went. When I got there, the closed sign was displayed at the door. I have no choice but to I waited outside in the heat. Ten, fifteen minutes passed and still no one came to the shop. Finally half an hour later, you showed up acting so callous. The heat was overwhelming and I was on the verge of losing my temper. I was determined to get the films develop. You took my rolls of film and told me it's going to take awhile. I waited outside the shop in the shade under an elm tree where it was cooler. I didn't think it was a good idea to wait inside the shop.

As I waited under the tree, you came by and brought me a popsicle and apologized for your behavior. You had a bad day and didn't mean to be so rude towards me. I say nothing in respond. The August sun seem to shine too brightly and is causing me to sweat profusely. Slowly I took the popsicle and accepted your apology. The ice coolness of the popsicle filled my body and for a moment I felt calm. You were not an unpleasant man. Nice looking with brownish rim glasses over a pair of small brown eyes. Your straight hair was divided on the side, kind of loose and sometimes would cover your eyes. You had a gentle way of speaking. I was at ease but felt a little nervous around you. Since graduating from college, I haven't met anyone that I like in particular. You seem to so nice and pleasant. I felt a little guilty for being so hastily.

When I did finally get to sees inside your shop, I was treated nicely by you. The walls were covered with family portraits, all happy people in their best outfits. It was a small shop, barely big enough for all the equipments and furniture. But there was a nice atmosphere here. I felt quite calm whenever I sat on that old couch, waiting for my photos. You often smile whenever you saw me. I was young and a little self-conscious and unsure of myself but tried not to show it.

One time you gave me a ride on your scooter. I was carrying a heavy load of books walking to the district office. You said I was your best customer and were not mind giving me a ride. I step on and almost fell out when you started the scooter. I instantly grab hold of your waist. I tried to hold on to you loosely, barely touching you. I was hesitant but you grabbed my hands and wrapped them around you. I was coy when you asked me why I don't have a boyfriend. I said the guys I know are all boring. You joked when I do find my prince, I might change my mind. I said maybe. The cool air swept through us as the scooter glided the street. The sun beats down on us, almost blinding me. I wanted to place my head on your shoulder but was afraid to do so. Instead I just tried to relax and enjoy the cool breeze.

I was in a rush a second time but you didn't seem to mind, you were happy to helped me even when you had other customers. While waiting for yet another roll of film, we share a box of ice cream. I told you I have five siblings. You were surprised by the number. You laughed and said, "Wow!" I told you my siblings and I often fought over ice cream. I found out you were the only son in the family, the youngest like me with an older sister. Still you were so much more mature than me but somehow we connected.

We exchange pleasantry when I was on my lunch break. Me and my coworker couldn't find a place that will let us dine. We had to eat take out on the streets. You were carrying groceries and told me you're a good cook. I didn't believe you at first. I thought how wonderful you knew how to cook. I was glad to see you even in that short moment. I watched as you drove away in your scooter.

You never seem sad. You were always happy to see me. I've never seen you get mad at anything. Maybe that's what me liked you. You were so kind to me when I brought my camera in. I asked you to fix it for me. You were nice about it and didn't charge me for it. You let me just sat in your shop while you fix my camera. I had a harsh day of work. Just sitting there relaxed me. The hot August summer heat was not letting up. I sat there while the fan blew cool air in my direction. You didn't bother me and let me sat there in silence.

Once I knobbed at your shop window. You were busy. I asked to come in. In the shop, I wonder through the equipments. You suggested to me about taking my portrait. I thought, oh, no, I can't. I'm just too plain. I'm not a beauty, I know that. Not ugly just plain. I had many people told me I'm pretty but it always embarrassed me. You convinced me to sat for you. You made me feel at ease. You'd make a mistake with your camera equipment. I laughed so hard I almost fell out of my chair. You said it might take a while for the print to develop so I didn't see the shot. I was having a good hair day that day. Maybe it came out alright. I wished I had done something to my straight black hair. Just having a band around my hair to get it out of my face was pretty much all I can do. I was wearing my blue shirt. I did feel a confidence that I never knew I had. As I looked into the camera, I smiled. A small smile at first. I was happy. I'm not sure where the happiness came from but I felt it has something to do with you. We chatted about each other's job and such but nothing special. I foolishly joked about buying you dinner in celebration of my first pay check. But then it was just a joke so no plans were made.

The rain poured all day the next day. It was a nice change of pace from the heat. I ran into you when you were getting your scooter fix. I had my umbrella and you asked me to share it. I joked that you would have to pay me. You, instead, agreed to buy me a drink later that night. We would to meet at your shop. At first I held the umbrella close to your side so you weren't get wet. My shirt was wet where the umbrella didn't covered. You took out a handkerchief for me when you saw my face was wet. You took my umbrella and held it closer to me and glided me closer to you - a few steps in front of you. The umbrella can cover both of us in this way. Your hand was on my arm. I felt shy as a schoolgirl on her first day of school. The warmth of your hand on my arm trickled through my shirt. I can smell the scent of rain with a mix of aftershave. I tried not to appeared too eager. We were silence through the walk.

I'd never show up for that night for the drink. The rain kept pouring harder and harder. I didn't know why I changed my mind at the last minute. I wasn't sure what was going on with me. I was sure you would be mad at me. I came by your shop the next morning. I quietly step inside. You were napping. Your eyeglasses were next to you. I picked it up and I sat down next to you. You seem so calm, sleeping there, your head laid back against the coach. I can see you're dreaming by the movements of your eyes. I wanted to wake you but I wasn't sure if I should. You waken just as I was about to make up my mind. I handed you your glasses. You smiled at me pleasantly as you put them on. I wonder why you always seem so happy to see me. You asked me why I didn't show. I told you I just didn't feel like it. You just laughed. I kept my head forward, not looking at you and then said I had to go to work. I didn't know what else to say. I felt your eyes on me as I left the shop.

Last Tuesday I went to the mall to try out some makeup. Brought some home and thought it was not so bad one me. The next afternoon I went to your shop. I had makeup on. It was the first time that I wore makeup in front of people. I felt a little self-conscious. I looked down at the floor as you looked at me. You seem surprised by my appearance and told me I looked pretty. I just smiled shyly. You made fun of me but in a nice way. I brought you some snacks. We chitchat about nothingness. I casually talked about going to an amusement park to ride those crazy rides. And also that I can get free admission from my friend who works there.

We went on a rollarcoaster ride. I screamed so loud, my ears rang. You barely let out a sound. I held on to your hand. I felt your happiness enveloped me. You got a little dizzy but it didn't seem to bother you. I brought you a drink and an vanilla ice cream cone. You seem hesitant about something but brush it off. We race each other at the school tracks just to see who's faster. It was so much fun, just running, the wind through my hair. I won and laughed. You waited for me outside the public bath. and then surprised me with a tangerine. You only brought two - one for me and one for yourself. I decided we should get more since they're my favorite fruit.

You walked me home when it got dark. You told me a true ghost story. I was pleasantly scare and said I might never be able to walk this side of town at night again. I wasn't sure you were telling the truth or not. I had my left arm around your arm. I asked you if you're scare of ghosts and you said people died, they turn into ghosts seems like a natural thing. If we think that way, we weren't be scare. I was not ready to let the evening end but we parted ways at your shop.

I was going to be transfer to a new district soon. I wanted to tell you the news but you were not at your shop. I waited all day, pacing back and forth, but you never show up. I decided to write you a letter. I sat in my room composing the letter all night. I slipped it into your shop door on a rainy Friday afternoon. Nothing much, just hello and that I was transferring to a new district, and pretty much bland nonsense.

I had to go to a different shop to get films develop. I sat and waited in the waiting area. A feeling of dread came over me as I stared at the floor. It has never occurred to me that I would miss seeing you but every time I passed the shop and saw that closed sign, my disappointment grew. The letter was still stuck in the doorway the next time that I came by. I was annoyed at you for not answering. So I tried to take the envelope out but it fell inside the shop. Leaving me no choice but to let it be.

I thought you have forgotten about me. I thought you were a jerk. I went dancing with my friends to try to forget you. The loud rock music made me want to run away. I ended up crying in the ladies room. My emotions overtook me. I didn't realized there were be this much tears. My eyes were red at the end of the evening. I wasn't sure what I was feeling. Guilt, remorse, bitterness? I went passed by your shop on my way home. It was dark inside. Still closed. I was so mad, impulsively I took a small rock and threw it at the window. It cracked and pieces of it fell to the ground. Tears fell onto my lips. I felt even worst. Then I went home and tried o sleep it off.

I don't know if you have actually read my letter but later on I was sure that you did. In October, I was transferred to work at a new district. The days went by so slowly. Some days I felt your presence near by. Other days loneliness seem to be everywhere. Winter came and it started to snow. The sidewalks were covered in white. The cold air seem stifling. The slowness of the days passed by without any incidents.

I did not know if you ever try to look for me. I just knew I would not be seeing you again. You remained in my mind even if it's a faded memory. Ever so often, thoughts of you would pop into my head. They disappear as soon as they came. I was content to work and wasted my free time doing nothing.

I went to visit your shop one last time. I was not hoping of seeing you there. It had been snowing for a couple of weeks. The whole town was covered in white. I wore my new black boots through the white snow. The shop was the same, nothing had change. The window that I broke was fixed. The closed sign was at the door. Snow covered the shop sign, most was dripping water down from the early afternoon sun. As I stood there staring at the shop, I noticed a portrait hanging in the window display. It was a black and white photograph, framed in black. Featuring a shy-looking girl with no make up and a pleasant smile on her face. The memory of that day came back to me. I had wonder how my portrait came out. Now I stared at myself through the glass window and can't helped but smile. I shifted my boots around. Thoughts of your face came to my mind. I remembered your pleasant smile and kind eyes. There would be no more waiting. No new memories to surface. This photograph will remind as a memory, a happy memory. I walked away feeling happy.

A letter came in the mail in late November. Your name was on the return address. But I did not want to open it. The white envelope that it came in was wet from the snow and my address was a little smeared. I took the envelope and placed it my jewelry box and placed the box in the back of my closet. After a while I have forgotten it was ever there but the memories of you still linger.