across the even horizon
where the sky touches earth
a girl swims around the moon
her apricot face hides in the shadows
covered in violets and vines
her tail thrashing against the waves
small circular sparkles
in the deep emerald ocean
a song keeps repeating
ascending deep from within
suffocated sorrows in hushed tones
carry away by the ocean of night
dissolve by the day's rays
she follows the moonlight
to where she will soon forget
her love exiled in the land of men
See the image that inspired this at Monday Mural.
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I am still an amateur at writing but hopefully I can get better with each new piece. I welcome any critiques or criticism. 
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7 Comments:
"Her apricot face... covered in violets and vines...suffocated sorrows in hushed tones...."
You have written a beautiful poem within your poem.
lissa, I really love this one. I can see her watching the land, and her love disappear, and singing her sorrow for her loss.
I love this one. The same images that Marcia has mentioned struck me too.
This is sad because she's leaving her lover behind. Otherwise, I'm with Marcia/ Carole that the images are so vivid. Beautifully written. Keep up the good work. Have a nice night.
Lovely.
Love this sense of exile. Also your image of an "apricot face" was enchanting.
Gemma
great take on the prompt lissa... i especially loved the last stanza....
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